{"id":10531,"date":"2020-11-21T12:04:39","date_gmt":"2020-11-21T18:04:39","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/?p=10531"},"modified":"2024-01-27T16:55:01","modified_gmt":"2024-01-27T22:55:01","slug":"all-white-nba-fantasy-league","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/all-white-nba-fantasy-league\/","title":{"rendered":"All-White NBA Fantasy League: A Basketball Experiment Steeped in Unintentional Comedy"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-17453 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" data-src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"650\" height=\"325\" data-srcset=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league.jpg 650w, https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league-600x300.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 650px) 100vw, 650px\" \/><noscript><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-17453 lazyload\" src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"650\" height=\"325\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league.jpg 650w, https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league-600x300.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 650px) 100vw, 650px\" \/><\/noscript><\/p>\n<h2><strong>&#8220;How can we make all the teams at least somewhat intriguing to everyone, keep this NBA fantasy league competitive and keep ourselves laughing?<\/strong><\/h2>\n<h2><em>What if we only draft white guys?<\/em><\/h2>\n<h2><strong>No, too \u2026 wait \u2014 WHAT???&#8221;<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Back in 2012, we got WEIRD.<\/p>\n<p>Basketball \u2014 a sport that perhaps best defines all-around athletic prowess.<\/p>\n<p>Its elite combine speed, quickness (two very different things), agility, conditioning, strength, coordination, explosiveness and split-second analysis.<\/p>\n<p>We all know a guy at the Y \u2014 he\u2019s 5\u20196\u2033, pudgy, bald, slow, hirsute, shoots from behind his head and smells off-putting. Despite all this, he can hit from 22 feet, at will, is deceptively quick and has a funky 12-foot runner that randomly and inexplicably comes in to play when the only business it ought to have is being swatted down his throat.<span id=\"more-776\"><\/span><\/p>\n<p><em>Observer #1: That guy is terrible.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Observer #2: He has 10 of their 13 points in this game.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Observer #1: The FUCK?!?!????!<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Basketball has athletic loopholes. Some can spot them, most cannot.<\/p>\n<p>We also know another guy \u2014 he plays in the same game. He is 6\u20196\u2033. He can barely shoot or dribble. He blocks and hacks the Hell out of everyone and, if he catches it, you can hit him for an alley-oop or two, per game.<\/p>\n<p><em>Observer #1: That guy is a beast.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Observer #2: He has one of their 13 points in this game.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Observer #1: The FUCK?!?!????!<\/em><\/p>\n<figure id=\"attachment_777\" class=\"wp-caption alignright\"><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"td-animation-stack-type0-1 alignright wp-image-777 size-full lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" data-src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/07\/footerlogo_white.png\" alt=\"Look, I'm doing my best not to break him, but he keeps whizzing around my ankles ... \" width=\"180\" height=\"42\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"td-animation-stack-type0-1 alignright wp-image-777 size-full lazyload\" src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2013\/07\/footerlogo_white.png\" alt=\"Look, I'm doing my best not to break him, but he keeps whizzing around my ankles ... \" width=\"180\" height=\"42\" \/><\/noscript><\/figure>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">You can\u2019t tell me that you\u2019re not baffled when J.J. Barea steps on to an NBA court. Basketball has athletic loopholes. Some fall ass-backward in to them, most do not.<\/p>\n<p style=\"text-align: left;\">In the NBA, these guys exist in certain capacities. Clearly, they are superior athletes, but just as goofy.<\/p>\n<p>How about when awkward-as-Hell Robin Lopez pulls a random post move out of his ass and the ball accidentally rattles through the net?<\/p>\n<p><em>Hey, that sort of looked like a basketball play!<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Let\u2019s digress a little \u2026<\/p>\n<p>This season, my friends and I looked at the notion of playing NBA fantasy league and were bored.<\/p>\n<p>NBA Fantasy is, arguably, the best test of knowledge in the fantasy world.<\/p>\n<p>Much like the NBA, the best team nearly always wins throughout the season.<\/p>\n<p>Teams are predictable.<\/p>\n<p>Whereas Ryan Braun may go 2-35 to kill you in a playoff week, or Adrian Peterson might go for 60 yards with no TDs, LeBron James is <em>never<\/em>\u00a0going for a 9 pt\/3 ast\/1 reb\/0 blk\/0 stl average over a three\/four game span.<\/p>\n<p><em>NEVER.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>The only wildcard in NBA fantasy is injuries.<\/p>\n<p>Last season, I front-ran a league throughout \u2026 then Dwight Howard decided to quit. My team became a\u00a0prototypical\u00a0first round bounce.<\/p>\n<p>And what dork can forget the March 2007\u00a0<em>AND\u00a0<\/em>2008 fantasy-depantsings pulled by Dwyane Wade\u2019s shoulder and knee, respectively?<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s all NBA fantasy basketball is \u2014 managing injuries. In nearly every league I have experienced, a team dominates for 50-75% of the season, due to an intelligent manager \u2026 who gets fucked by a late injury \u2014 some random #4 seed wins and everybody is disappointed.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s no fun.<\/p>\n<p>Nor is Roto \u2014 to all of you asshats who will suggest that cheesedick nerdery.<\/p>\n<p>This is\u00a0<em>Amurrica<\/em>\u00a0\u2014 we have playoffs. We aren\u2019t the English Premier League.<\/p>\n<p>Roto is a shitty fantasy option because half the league checks out by Week 10. Nobody trades. Nobody talks.<\/p>\n<p>Basically, two people care.<\/p>\n<p><em>[SIDE NOTE: I am a fan of Roto playoffs in head-to-head leagues, especially in football. Six teams in, three weeks, cumulative points. In my experience, nobody backs in to FF playoffs. Every team that grinds its ass in deserves a chance to play until the end and nobody gives a shit about consolation matchups.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Managers check out after teams lose and there never seems to be any hype for the championship. Even the sixth place team would have an outside chance going in to Week 3.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>After a long season of personal investment and fucking with one\u2019s very best friends, I feel like this would make fantasy football playoffs particularly awesome. Catch up to my genius, Yahoo.]<\/em><\/p>\n<p>As the few people in my crew who still wanted to play fantasy NBA looked at the 2012-2013 season, the prevailing question became:<\/p>\n<p><em>How can we play fantasy NBA in a way that is funny, or at least FUN?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>I don\u2019t know.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>Draft the worst team?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>No. Too easy to manipulate.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>Draft only bench guys?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>No. Too boring.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>Draft only injured guys?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>What????<\/strong><\/p>\n<h2><b>Let us remember one thing about fantasy \u2014 your NBA fantasy basketball team is the most interesting thing on Earth to you and the least interesting thing on Earth to everyone else, even the people in your league.<\/b><\/h2>\n<p><strong>How can we make all the teams at least somewhat intriguing to everyone, keep it competitive and keep ourselves laughing?<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><em>What if we only draft white guys?<\/em><br \/>\n<em>You can only draft white guys. Every team will get a marquee guy \u2014 Love, Dirk, the Gasols, David Lee, Steve Nash; ok, so you could only have like four teams \u2014 and then dig around for role players.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Imagine this conversation:<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Me: I\u2019ll give you Luke Ridnour for Kosta Kufos.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>You: Haha. Luke Ridnour and Kosta Kufos. Also, fuck you. I\u2019m not doing that fleece-job.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><strong>Dear God \u2026 it\u2019s \u2026 gorgeous.<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>So, we ran with it.<\/p>\n<p>To be fair, it makes me a little uncomfortable, but the idea is based in humor, not race. The truth is that white NBA players \u2014\u00a0<em>no matter how you slice them<\/em>\u00a0\u2014 are funny.<\/p>\n<p>Try this experiment:<\/p>\n<p>See, you just laughed.<\/p>\n<p>I loved the notion of potential angry message board posts like this:<\/p>\n<p><em>\u201cYourMomsBalls is a dick \u2014 offering me Steve Novak for Ersan Ilyasova is pathetic. Shove your shitty trade deals up your ass. Throw in Greg Stiemsma and maybe we can talk, douche.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Which brings me to my next point \u2026<\/p>\n<p>White NBA players not only look preposterous, but they also tend to have hilarious names.<\/p>\n<p><em>Greg Steimsma \u2014\u00a0<\/em>the name alone conjures an image of a lumbering Wisconsin hunk of gigantic Wonderbread.<\/p>\n<p>I don\u2019t need to post a picture. Whatever vision that name invokes for you \u2014 that\u2019s what he looks like.<\/p>\n<p>Guaranteed.<\/p>\n<p>Anyway, let\u2019s get to the ground rules \u2014 from the invite email:<\/p>\n<p><em>Every player on every team must be white \u2014 save for your second bench spot, which will be reserved for a black guy with a white name (i.e. Wesley Matthews). This player is NEVER allowed to play. He is simply an ornament.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Each of the four teams (seriously, there can only be four \u2014 and it\u2019s a stretch) will consist of two guards, two forwards, a center, two utility and the aforementioned two (really one) bench.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Statistical categories include Games Started and Field Goals Attempted, as these are at a premium in the world of white players.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Other categories include: Minutes, Free Throws Attempted, Points, 3-Pointers Made, Rebounds, Assists, Steals, Blocks, Assist-to-Turnover Ratio and Personal Fouls.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>I wanted to make Personal Fouls a positive thing, but Yahoo doesn\u2019t have that function.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Apologies to the ghost of Joe Kleine.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Kevin Love, Dirk Nowitzki and Ricky Rubio will start the season on IR, but should probably still go 1\/2\/3.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>Which brings me to my other point \u2014 white foreigners count. But your Steph Curry\/Blake Griffin\/<a href=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/milked-klay-thompson-interview-worth\/\">Klay Thompson<\/a>?<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>No.\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>A vote will be taken on Kris Humphries, who is 75% white. Jeremy Lin is out.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>A master list of eligible players for this NBA fantasy league will be provided, pre-draft. It will, of course, be called, <strong>The White List<\/strong>.<br \/>\n<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>The commissioner (me) will immediately drop any non-approved players from your team. If you sneak one in to a lineup, you will forfeit that week.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>This will be the stupidest \u2014 evidenced by the fact that it should be stated as\u00a0<strong>most stupid\u00a0<\/strong>\u2014 NBA fantasy league of all time.<\/em><\/p>\n<p>The draft \u2014 by team \u2014 went like this:<\/p>\n<p><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-17457 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" data-src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-basketball-all-white-roster.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"669\" height=\"268\" data-srcset=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-basketball-all-white-roster.png 669w, https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-basketball-all-white-roster-600x240.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 669px) 100vw, 669px\" \/><noscript><img decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-17457 lazyload\" src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-basketball-all-white-roster.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"669\" height=\"268\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-basketball-all-white-roster.png 669w, https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-basketball-all-white-roster-600x240.png 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 669px) 100vw, 669px\" \/><\/noscript><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-17456 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" data-src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-basketball-all-white-roster-2.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"182\" height=\"270\" \/><noscript><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter size-full wp-image-17456 lazyload\" src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-basketball-all-white-roster-2.png\" alt=\"\" width=\"182\" height=\"270\" \/><\/noscript><\/p>\n<p>Two of the four NBA fantasy league team managers were inexplicably drafting from the same computer \u2014 and I\u2019m still not sure how that works \u2014 while \u00a0the other two had loaded <em>The White List\u00a0<\/em>in to Yahoo\u2019s Pre-Draft Rankings and, hence, were picking rapid fire.<\/p>\n<p>That moves pretty fast in a four-team league \u2014 especially when drafting from the same computer as another guy, with 90 seconds on the clock and nothing but a printout of random, generally unrecognizable names.<\/p>\n<p>Clearly, Kevin Love\u2019s 2012-2013 no-show has been brutal for the first team \u2026\u00a0<em>mine<\/em>.<\/p>\n<p>That aside, my team \u2014 first\u00a0<em>SuburbanDateRapists<\/em>, then\u00a0<em>David Faustino<\/em>\u00a0(because of\u00a0the whitest rap video that was attempting to be non-white, of all-time) \u2014 stands in second place \u2026 33 games behind\u00a0<em>The Small Penises<\/em>, who really cleaned up late with Ersan Ilyasova and Nikola Pekovic.<\/p>\n<p>And that\u2019s the point \u2014 I just got to say that a team\u00a0<em>cleaned up\u00a0<\/em>by drafting\u00a0<em>Ersan Ilysova<\/em>\u00a0and\u00a0<em>Nikola Pekovic \u2026<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Such is the Old Zealand All-Whites.<\/p>\n<h2>Judge it if you want, but we have made NBA Fantasy league fun again. Maybe it\u2019s racist, but that is certainly not the intent.<\/h2>\n<p>I leave you with a true original \u2014\u00a0<em>The White List<\/em>\u00a0email:<\/p>\n<div><em>I have compiled The\u00a0White\u00a0List, in all its glory.\u00a0<\/em><em>It includes 84 candy-faced goons \u2014 20.1 % of the NBA. With only four teams, I think I am going to expand the rosters. I want us digging deep in to the alabaster crevasses of the league.\u00a0<\/em><em>Thinking about eight per team, plus the\u00a0white-name black guy who can never play.\u00a0<\/em><em>That means 32 will be on rosters and 52 on the wire \u2014 digging through which is going to be hilarious.\u00a0<\/em><em>Notable statistics from the fact-finding mission include:<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u2014 LAC &amp; Memphis will be attempting to win without any\u00a0white\u00a0players this season \u2026 and I can\u2019t believe there are just two. This is going to work out.<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div>\n<figure id=\"attachment_813\" class=\"wp-caption alignleft\"><figcaption class=\"wp-caption-text\"><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-17453 lazyload\" src=\"data:image\/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAIAAAAAAAP\/\/\/yH5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7\" data-src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"650\" height=\"325\" data-srcset=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league.jpg 650w, https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league-600x300.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 650px) 100vw, 650px\" \/><noscript><img fetchpriority=\"high\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"size-full wp-image-17453 lazyload\" src=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"650\" height=\"325\" srcset=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league.jpg 650w, https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/11\/nba-fantasy-league-600x300.jpg 600w\" sizes=\"(max-width: 650px) 100vw, 650px\" \/><\/noscript><br \/>\nFrom left, Timberwolves players Alexey Shved, Andrei Kirilenko, Nikola Pekovic, Jose Juan Barea and Ricky Rubio pose for a photo during Timberwolves media day at Target Center in Minneapolis, Minn., on Monday, October 1, 2012.<\/p>\n<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<p><em>\u2014 Minnesota Timberwolves have an astounding TEN\u00a0WHITE\u00a0PLAYERS!<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><em>What the Hell?<\/em><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><em>That\u2019s one less than TWO ENTIRE DIVISIONS.<\/em><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><em>Just breath-taking, Minny. Breath-taking.<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Anyway, here is formal\u00a0list\u00a0of players and the approved black guys with\u00a0white\u00a0names that 100% MUST NEVER PLAY (even though you are all required to have one of them at all times):<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div>\n<div><em>Darko Milicic BOS<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Brook Lopez BK<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Kris Humphries BK<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Tornike Shengelia BK<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Mirza Teletovic BK<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Steve Novak NYK<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Pablo Prigioni PHI<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Spencer Hawes PHI<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Andrea Bargnani TOR<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Aaron Gray TOR<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Jonas Valanciunas TOR<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Jose Calderon TOR<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Linas Kleiza TOR<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>David Lee GS<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Andrew Bogut GS<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Andris Biedrins GS<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Steve Blake LAL<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Pau Gasol LAL<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Steve Nash LAL<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Goran Dragic PHX<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Marcin Gortat PHX<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Luis Scola PHX<\/em><br clear=\"none\" \/><em>Luke Zeller PHX<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em><a href=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/can-jimmer-fredette-succeed-in-the-nba-google-jj-redick-for-your-answer\/\">Jimmer Fredette<\/a> SAC<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Marco Belinelli CHI<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Omri Casspi CLE<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Luke Harangody CLE<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Jon Leuer CLE<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Jonas Jerekbo DET<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Viacheslav Kravtsov DET<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Kyle Singler DET<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Miles Plumlee IND<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Ben Hansbrough IND<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Tyler Hansbrough IND<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Mike Dunleavy MIL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Ersan Ilyasova MIL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Joel Przybilla MIL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Beno Udrih MIL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Chris Kaman DAL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Dirk Nowitzki DAL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Cole Aldrich HOU<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Omer Asik HOU<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Carlos Delfino HOU<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Dontas Matiejunas HOU<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Chandler Parsons HOU<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Ryan Anderson NO<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Robin Lopez NO<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Jason Smith NO<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Matt Bonner SA<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Tiago Splitter SA<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Manu Ginobili SA<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Nando de Colo SA<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Kyle Korver ATL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Zaza Pachulia ATL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Matt Caroll CHA<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Byron Mullens CHA<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Mike Miller MIA<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Josh Harrellson MIA<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Josh McRoberts ORL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>J.J. Redick ORL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Hedo Turkoglu ORL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Nikola Vucevic ORL<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Jan Vesely DC<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Danilo Gallinari DEN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Kosta Koufos DEN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Timofey Mosgov DEN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Lou Amundson MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>J.J. Barea MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Chase Budinger MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Andre Kirilenko MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Kevin Love MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Luke Ridnour MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Nikola Pekovic MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Ricky Rubio MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Alexey Shved MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Greg Stiemsma MIN<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Nick Collison OKC<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Luke Babbit POR<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Victor Claver POR<\/em><\/div>\n<p>Joel Freeland POR\u00a0(THIS GUY IS FUCKING BRITISH \u2014 HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE???)<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Meyers Leonard POR<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Sasha Pavlovic POR<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Gordon Hayward UTH<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>Enes Kanter UTH<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div>\n<div><em>By Team &amp; Division:<\/em><\/div>\n<div><\/div>\n<div><em>BOS \u2013 1<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>BK \u2013 4<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>PHI \u2013 2<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>TOR \u2013 5<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>NYK \u2013 1<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>13<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>GS \u2013 3<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>LAC \u2013 0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>LAL \u2013 3<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>PHX \u2013 4<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>SAC \u2013 1<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>11<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>CHI \u2013 1<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>CLE \u2013 3<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>DET \u2013 3<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>IND \u2013 3<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>MIL \u2013 4<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>14<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>DAL \u2013 2<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>HOU \u2013 5<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>MEM \u2013 0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>NO \u2013 3<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>SA \u2013 4<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>14<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>ATL \u2013 2<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>CHA \u2013 2<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>MIA \u2013 2<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>ORL \u2013 4<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>DC \u2013 1<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>11<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>DEN \u2013 3<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>MIN \u2013 10<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>OKC \u2013 1<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>POR \u2013 5<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>UTH \u2013 2<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>21<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>\u00a0<\/em><\/div>\n<div><em>BLACK GUY NAMES \u2013 KIM ENGLISH, LANCE STEPHENSON, GEORGE HILL, JOHN HENSON, <a href=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/boban-is-the-most-efficient-scorer-ever-and-tobias-harris-thinks-its-hilarious\/\">TOBIAS HARRIS<\/a>, <a href=\"https:\/\/i80sportsblog.com\/bucks-larry-sanders-misspells-latest-tattoo\/\">LARRY SANDERS<\/a>, JOSH SELBY, LANCE THOMAS, JOHN JENKINS, IVAN JOHNSON, MIKE SCOTT, BRADLEY BEAL, WESLEY MATTHEWS<\/em><\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>&#8220;How can we make all the teams at least somewhat intriguing to everyone, keep this NBA fantasy league competitive and 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